Your Ally-Mind and Enemy-Mind: Actively
Seeking Relief from Your Own Mental Goblins by Rick Jetter,
Your Ally-Mind and Enemy-Mind: Actively
Seeking Relief from Your Own Mental Goblins
by: Rick Jetter, Ph.D.
Author of: Sutures of the Mind: Unleashing the Power of Mindfulness in 30 Days
While Rescuing Your Spirit
Something negative has happened to you in the past and something negative will
probably happen to you again in your lifetime because we are all humans.
Tragedy. Divorce. Crime. The death of a loved one.
Mistakes. Big mistakes. Anxiety. Stress.
Misfortune and disaster. Life is tough. Sometimes we feel
lost. Abandoned out to sea without a life preserver or boat. Sharks
swimming underneath our feet. We have all been there.
But, there are two kinds of minds:
1. Your Ally-Mind -and-
2. Your Enemy-Mind
The goal is to activate your Ally-Mind and practice sharpening your Ally-Mind so
frequently that it takes over your Enemy-Mind (or, at least, reduces its impact
on your mental health and well-being).
Obviously, allies are good and enemies are bad in this case–even if you might
be able to forgive your “goblins” of the past, someday.
As you sit alone, your Enemy-Mind looks to destroy you. It can haunt you.
It can remind you of things that will make you sweat or cause your hands
to tremble. You might have options to deal with your pain or you might
not. Either way, something has to happen. Something good has to
overcome the pain.
That’s where mindfulness can help you. It can actually help to rescue
The art of mindfulness engages your senses into focusing on the here-and-now
events or activities of daily life with acute concentration on all of the
taken-for-granted pleasures in life that we might regularly pass on by.
The following list contains SEVEN ways to expunge your mental goblins and SEVEN
ways to help your own healing. After all, the toughest thing to deal with
in life is when your own mind turns against you and makes living a happy life
First, let’s recognize how your Enemy-Mind will strive to tear you apart and
what you can do to deal with these reckless behaviors of your Enemy-Mind:
1.) You are feeling alone.
Counteract it with: Calling a friend right away. Talk to them. Tell
them how important they are to you. Ask them for help. Ask God for
help, out loud. He always listens. You never have to leave a
2.) You are feeling broken.
Counteract it with: Looking in the mirror and focusing on your beautiful
features. Tell yourself that when you look into the mirror in six months,
you will be in a different place. If that place doesn't feel better,
remind yourself that you will be in a better place six months after that.
Focus on your face. Look at the beautiful smile that you have.
3.) You are feeling helpless.
Counteract it with: Setting yourself up for tiny successes. Grab a sheet
of paper and a pen and write three goals that you will accomplish in three
months. Make your goals measurable and achievable. Put the sheet of
paper on your fridge and each day that passes by, ask yourself, “Am I doing
a little something today to move me towards fulfilling my goals?”
Remember . . . Baby steps.
4.) You are engaging in excess.
Counteract it with: Questioning how much you might smoke, drink, eat, or do
anything else in excess. Excess is the enemy. It is a behavioral
assault on you from your Enemy-Mind. Are you doing something other than
using mindfulness to deal with your pain? If so, you need to reduce your
excess immediately. If you need more professional help with problems of
excess, contact a health professional in your area for more guidance.
5.) You are feeling distant from God.
Counteract it with: Talking to God openly and in a conversational manner.
Thank him for anything that goes right, but still thank him during tough
times. The tough times will make you stronger (I know that this is a bit
cliché). But, it's true. When things are going really well,
thank God each and every single day. Don't decrease your spiritual
visits because “times aren’t that tough” and you “don't think
you need Him right now.”
6.) You are feeling lost without a recovery plan.
Counteract it with: Knowing that you can settle down your racing thoughts.
Repetitiveness is crucial when using mindfulness. You want to get to
the point where you have trained your mind to think positively and in-focus so
that it becomes second nature for you. Don’t get frustrated if your
concentration goes out the window. Condition yourself. Build up your
time on task from seconds to minutes to double digit minutes to an hour.
7.) You are feeling that your problems aren’t that big.
Counteract it with: Knowing that it’s not about little or big problems.
It’s about how we handle them and cope with all of those terrible
moments that cross our paths. I've met hundreds of people who start
out with some anxiety or grief and then it escalates into a bigger nightmare.
Don't let your grief, pain, anxieties, depression, or blame get
bigger! Eradicate it while it is small!
So, what are some things that you can start doing right now so you can move your
life forward? Here are SEVEN foolproof strategies that can help you to
stop the negative thoughts that are racing through your mind.
1.) Expunge your goblins (outwardly).
When you have a negative thought or flashback, talk directly to that
“goblin” and tell it that you are going to postpone thinking about it
because you are focusing on a mindful activity, such as painting a room with a
new, vibrant color, doing a word search, or writing down something in a
2.) Look for Miracles.
As you get up each morning, anticipate possible miracles that will enter into
your life. While this might sound like an unrealistic step to take in your
own healing process, it creates a wonder of excitement and sharpens your senses
to look for anything out there that is extraordinary!
3.) Realize that your path is already paved.
God knows where you will be in one year, one month, or one day. He already
has a master plan for you. Remind yourself that you will be in a different
place next year and if it isn't where you want to be, you will be in a
different place the year after that one expires, anyway. God will take
care of you. He always does.
4.) Unite yourself with others.
It is easy to isolate yourself, feel sorry for yourself, and become depressed
because you might even be setting up your environment for a depressive state
(staying in bed, not going out, not calling your family or friends back, etc.)
and you might not even realize it! Unity binds us to both mind and spirit,
socially, and it supports each step that we take during our short-term or
long-term healing processes. Everyone needs a TEAM!
5.) Plan an escape route.
Houdini was a master at escaping his bound wrists or underwater entanglements.
Why? Because he knew what he was going to do before stepping foot in
the water! You also need to create escape routes in case your mind gets
the best of you. Place a granola bar or a crossword puzzle in three areas
that you frequent the most. Your kitchen. Near a phone. Many
people place their “getaways” in their cars or where they keep their
car keys. That way, you have sensory outlets (taste, touch, etc.) for
mindfulness strategies and activities before your mind starts to wander into the
unpleasant worlds dictated by your Enemy-Mind.
6.) Do something physical.
Assemble Something. Run a mile outside. Your physical health is
linked to your mental health. Find something to keep your juices flowing.
Focus on physical activities and think only of those activities while you
are doing them (putting a toy together for your child, shooting hoops with your
buddy, etc.). This will strengthen your concentration and steer you away
from mental anguish and imprisonment.
And finally . . .
7.) Make a comeback!
Don't settle for excuse-making or phrases like, “I'll think about
it . . .” or “Maybe later . . .” or “I'll try to . .
.” Make a conscious point to be active, not passive in your own
healing. Whatever terrible event or experience that is banging away at your mind
and spirit can be reckoned with when your state of mind is in an active mode of
construction, not destruction. Don't settle for anything else!
It is good to be alive and it all can start right now by healing your own
“sutures of the mind.” Continue to grow your Ally-Mind and never, ever
let your Enemy-Mind take over your life! There is way too much joy in life
that lies ahead for you.